How many times... 42?

What I meant by the title was both a reference to the "Hitchhiker's" trilogy and the number of times I've claimed to be "back again." I know, you're tired of hearing that. This time I mean it, although I'm no longer daily.

I've decided, for 2010 and beyond, to take back my life from my job. In 2008 I had a good balance on my personal life and my job; all I needed was to bring my family into that circle. And really that wouldn't have been too hard; a large part of my personal life is my family anyway. What I was missing was longer, closer relations with my children (who are now teenagers). My son is looking at high schools; my daughter will be looking at (gasp!) colleges next year. At this point I can relate to them on an equal level, something I have had difficulty doing in the past... not their fault, mine. I had some issues to work out and, while they're still issues, I now know what they are, and that's (more than) half the battle.

2009 was, in many different ways, a lost year for me. Betty and I accomplished a few things we set out to do, the kids are growing into (relatively) responsible people, and things like that. Somehow, though, I lost my own way; the energy I used to spend on my personal things (learning, raising children, continually building my relationship with my wife etc.) by July was getting spent on work. I hit the dreaded burn-out and, what was worse, I knew it and let it happen anyway.

2010 is going to be different. I'm taking my life back... all of it. While I still want to do well in the office I am no longer going to get worried when people tell me they need something "now" and I don't get it to them until "five minutes from now". That was my problem: trying to please everyone only resulted in pissing everyone off. When I gave one pissed-off person more time so they wouldn't get mad that time came from another person who wasn't mad, but got mad when they found out I couldn't finish their project because I borrowed their time for the other projects. No more. Time is getting budgeted by priority and value, and those items come from my management, not someone to whom I do not report.

I have discussed this with both my management and the project managers I produce work for. My manager is all for it and, surprisingly, most of the people I work with are also for it; they realize most of me is better than none of me. Those who are not, well, I will do my best to meet their demands but there are new lines I won't cross (they're fuzzy lines, but better than no lines at all). You know PMs, though; most are reasonable, and there are a few who think they own you.

One last piece of news: you may notice I'll sometimes sign my blog "danodea" and tag each entry with that. I am starting to build a brand for myself, and that's it. Simple, to the point: my name. I did, briefly, consider DFO; I did use that in a brand-like sense for 20+ years. However, that personality is no longer dominant, if you will; I got that nickname in college, and I think I need to shed some of its, let's say less graceful connotations. Besides, how do I explain to upper-management types why my middle name is "James" but the middle letter in my brand of "initials" is "F"? No easy task for a professional, so that has to go. Those of you who knew me in college or early in my career will understand; the rest of you, go ahead and guess; it's not that difficult, and when you get it right it will be crystal-clear why I'm dropping it.

After that digression, I will close with saying I will try to blog here once a week. Since I have three blogs (two work blogs and this one) I can't manage a daily effort. If I have a really good entry I may duplicate it across blogs... well, at least this one and my primary work blog, which is career-oriented (my third blog is a grammar blog and will not be copied here). If I do use the same entry at work and here (DISCLAIMER FOLLOWS) there will never be any specific IBM information on it; it will either be redacted or not used at all. For an example, please read the third and fourth paragraphs; in a different (and enlarged) form it has already appeared on my IBM blog.

It's good to be back.